Winter First Date Tips

Ice skating

A perfect way to break the ice, this is a classic winter date idea, and it's no wonder why: You get to wrap your arms around one another, have some laughs and get some fresh air and exercise. Half the fun is trying to stay standing up, and the other half is helping each other up.

Hot chocolate

Instead of meeting for coffee, make things a little sweeter. A hot chocolate date can come after some time in the snow, or can be done all on its own. Bonus: chocolate is considered an aphrodisiac - so use one hand for your warm cup and the other one to hold his.

Build a snowman or a snow fort

This first date activity will require you to work as a team, and will keep you totally relaxed and having fun - it's a great way to get to know your date without too much pressure to make conversation. If the mood is right, maybe you can start a playful snowball fight!

Get cooking

Instead of going out, make a meal of dessert together. Start by scouting a recipe you both want to try, then shop for the ingredients together and spend the night making it all perfect. The pressure of making conversation is removed when you have a recipe to follow, measuring to do and batter to stir. You'll be surprised by how much you can get to know someone by cooking with them.

Wine tasting

It's not just for the summer - many wineries are open year-round and will conduct tours and wine tastings for little or no charge. Wineries are beautiful, historic and naturally romantic and if the first date goes well you can buy a bottle for the next meal you share together.

Get some game

Cuddle up in the bleachers at a hockey game. There plenty of local leagues and most of the time the games are free to attend. Pick a team and root for together, or bet against one another and sweeten the pot with a romantic reward. Either way, you will have a great opportunity to chat and get to know each other between periods.

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Posture and the Enemy Within

Habit influences everything you do. How you stand, sit, breathe and even think. But are you aware of their total influence on your actions? Try the following experiment.

1. Fold your arms and note the position of your hands and which arm is on the outside.

2. Now unfold them and fold them again but this time the opposite way. Note your reaction to how this feels.

Does it feel odd or even wrong? In the first step you used your habitual 'folding the arms' pattern. You did not have to think about how you did it because you have an existing pattern; it's automatic and feels right. Did you have to think for a moment before carrying out the second instruction? It may even have taken several attempts to achieve. This is because you do not have an existing pattern for this movement and it has to be consciously worked out. It will probably feel wrong because you will not have done it like this before so the sensations from the muscles and joints will be new to you.

The important lesson from this experiment is how the two positions feel. Your habitual pattern feels right and is easy to do, your non-habitual opposite way feels wrong and is not quite so easy to do. There is obviously nothing wrong with the opposite arm-fold but that is exactly how it will feel. Would you normally choose to fold your arms in this manner? What feels right and wrong is therefore determined by habits that may be working for you but also against you.

So familiar feels right, unfamiliar feels wrong. There would have been a time when you didn't fold you arms and you learnt by watching others do it. The important point is that you will have learnt to fold them in a particular way with either left or right arm on the outside. If you have never folded them the other way around you will never choose to do it this way and probably never cross your mind that it could be done another way. Whichever way you do it first you are likely to become stuck with it; it's your habit for life. Folding your arms in the same way continues to re-enforce the feeling of rightness whilst creating the set of 'rules' for this pattern you will always follow.

Now what about how you stand, sit and walk, your basic actions that you spend every day performing? Why should these actions be exempt from the 'rules' that apply to your arm-folding habit? Of course they are not. So how you sit at your desk is done in a way you have learnt to do it and it will feel right. There are many ways to sit but would you ever try these out? If you do, how do they feel? Can you maintain your new sitting position for long? People can soon become uncomfortable as they use new muscles for sitting that are normally inactive for sitting.

So in effect we all create our own unique bubble to exist in but we can't see it because we are in it. To the snowman inside his dome the weather never appears to change! If you develop poor habits relating to movement how would you know? Neck, back and shoulder pain are the most obvious symptoms but how can you accurately identify the cause when the fault lies with the very equipment you would use to diagnose and correct it? Never performing to your full potential is a less obvious symptom simply because if you haven't been there how do you know if you are underachieving?

So when you try to change your posture, don't do what feels right! Yes this does sound a little odd, but remember what feels right is down to your habits: the ones causing the problem! To successfully change a habit, any habit, you will have to go into the unknown - the feeling you had when folding your arms the opposite way. This is the only way you can be sure you are not engaging your old, poor habits.

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1983 television commercial for Grace Bros, they're all the things you are (so sayeth the jingle). Not sure about the lady with the physcho eyes at 0.40.

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